


Variegated Carnations

by tkshoyo



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Angst with a Happy Ending, Haikyuu Rarepair Week 2021, Hanahaki Disease, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, dont worry its okay nobody dies, rated T for swearing and some blood, tendou's mom is kind of crazy and i love her, they're in college together but that doesnt really matter much
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-14 12:21:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28545522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tkshoyo/pseuds/tkshoyo
Summary: Suga, already exhausted, returns to his shared apartment with his best friend Tendou, only to find the boy unconscious in the bathroom, surrounded by petals.
Relationships: Sugawara Koushi & Tendou Satori, Sugawara Koushi/Tendou Satori
Comments: 4
Kudos: 42





	Variegated Carnations

**Author's Note:**

> this fic was made for haikyuu rarepair week day 4. prompt used was flowers. mild warning for blood and hospital equipment

The last four- five? Six, maybe? He’d lost track- Hours had probably been among the most stressful of Suga’s life.

He’d come home to his and Tendou’s shared apartment a little earlier than usual that day, let out of his job at the cafe early because the manager had caught him nearly falling asleep standing for the third time and insisted he go home and  _ rest, damnit. _

So with not much of a choice but to listen to her, he’d driven home and was definitely ready to just lay down in his bed and sleep for a day, if he hadn’t noticed something was  _ off. _

He hadn’t heard Tendou’s routine over-eccentric greeting when he walked into the apartment. Which wasn’t a big deal all on its own. Maybe he was in his room listening to music on full blast, or watching a new episode of an anime, and hadn’t heard Suga. Or maybe he was taking one of his midday naps.

But he couldn’t shake this feeling of dread creeping up on him, so he called into the apartment.

“Tendou?” He took off his coat and stomped the snow off his boots before taking them off. Tendou’s boots and coat were hung where they normally were, so he must still be in the apartment.

He walked to the kitchen and stopped when he caught a whiff of something smelling vaguely metallic. His eyes landed on the counter.

A scattering of petals and flowers were on the counter.  _ Variegated carnation,  _ Suga’s tired mind supplied. At first it didn’t seem too out of the ordinary, aside from the fact that Tendou wasn’t one to buy flowers, especially not in the winter.

But he did a double take.

_ Oh,  _ he thought dully.  _ Blood. Tendou must’ve pricked himself on the thorns. _

Except that made no sense, because carnations have no thorns, and these flowers didn’t even have stems.

And there was definitely too much blood to have just come from one tiny prick in the skin.

His sense of dread even more prevalent now, he left the flowers and walked down the hallway to Tendou’s room. Empty. He tried his own room, empty.

So that just left the bathroom.

Suga opened the door and was immediately overwhelmed by the smell of blood. He shook his head and reopened his eyes.

There Tendou was, slumped over the toilet, covered in blood and looking paler than he’d ever seen him.

Everything else happened so quickly Suga couldn’t really remember much of it- he remembered shaking Tendou and calling an ambulance, bits and pieces of the ride to the hospital as people asked how he knew Tendou. The one question he clearly remembers was if Tendou had a family history of Hanahaki, to which Suga had no answer.

Hanahaki. He should’ve guessed. What other disease made you hack up flowers?

So here Suga was now, four or five or six hours later, sitting at Tendou’s bedside and trying not to think about all the tubes and needles stuck in his friend. Too afraid to fall asleep, even though his body ached with fatigue, and shaking his head whenever a nurse asked if he was ready to leave.

Because what if Tendou died as Suga slept? What if Tendou died and Suga wasn’t there?

He wouldn’t ever forgive himself if that happened.

Tendou was still asleep, under an anesthesia and a lot of medicine to slow the spread of the flowers and reduce the pain. The doctors had listed off what they were giving Tendou, but Suga hadn’t been listening.

A nurse walked up to him and he was about to refuse leaving once again, but she cut him off.

“We’re going to be lifting the anesthesia enough so he’s awake once we do a minor operation on him. He nor his relatives have given us permission to remove the roots, so all we will be doing is clearing his throat. It won’t take long, but you should get some rest in the meanwhile.”

She gestured to the door and Suga, despite his mind screaming at him not to leave, stood and walked out, returning to the waiting room.

He sat down in one of the chairs. Tendou’s mother, a fiercely kind and aged woman, looked to him as he sat.

“Don’t feel bad, it’s nobody’s fault.” She said.

Suga shook his head. “I’m his roommate. I’ve known him for what, four years? I should’ve realized something was wrong sooner. He’s been acting weird for a month and I-”

“Stop.” Tendou-san said. “Stop thinking that way. I know my son. I know the pain he must be in. I’ve had Hanahaki before too. He kept this from us on purpose, to keep us all from hurting. He doesn’t blame you for not knowing, so I don’t either.”

Suga stared down at the floor. He knew Tendou-san was right, but he couldn’t bring himself to think that way. When he’d walked into the hospital room and saw Tendou, usually eccentric and always fidgeting or talking, deathly still with countless tubes in him on a hospital bed, he couldn’t help but think that this was all his fault, all his own doing.

“You should try and catch a wink out here.” Tendou-san said, startling Suga out of his thoughts. “You look half-dead.”

He gave a small smile at her bluntness but shook his head. “I can’t sleep. What if Tendou wakes up?”

“During the operation?” Tendou-san pointed out. “If that happens, the doctors’ll give him a heavier dose. Now just get some sleep before I knock you out myself, I hate seeing you like this.”

Suga must’ve still looked uncertain, because Tendou-san continued.

“Satori would hate to learn that you’re in the hospital for sleep deprivation because of him.”

“Fine, I’ll try and sleep.” Suga murmured, the last comment finally breaking his resolve.

Tendou-san let out a hum of satisfaction as Suga leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes. He was worried it would take him a while to fall asleep, but he was out in an instant.

  
  


\---

  
  


Suga woke up to Tendou-san shaking him awake. “Operation’s done. He’s conscious now- still got a lot of flowers in his lungs, though- and he asked to see you first.”

Suga blinked. “What? I’m the last person he should wanna see.”

Tendou-san frowned, her red eyes boring into Suga. “Stop that or the hospital will have another patient to be treating.”

Suga closed his mouth. Tendou’s mother gestured to the door. “Go on in now. Don’t keep him waiting.”

Suga walked over to the door and pushed it open.

The room was empty except for a nurse and Tendou, who looked only marginally better. At least he didn’t have a breathing tube at the moment.

Suga sat down besides Tendou. Tendou was still pale and his hair fell on his face rather than it being spiked up in its usual gelled style. He looked at Suga and then looked away.

“..So uh, I’m sorry you had to see me like that.” Tendou began, his voice hoarse.

Suga could feel barely held-back emotions welling up inside him again. Anger, grief, worry- he couldn’t discern any one from the other.

“..I swear I planned on admitting myself to the hospital.”

“No the fuck you didn’t.” Suga snapped. “If you did you would’ve gone in two weeks ago.”

Tendou looked at him, his eyes seeming pained. “It’s not easy to admit you have- you’ve got Hanahaki.”

Suga took in a breath. He was angry at everyone- angry at Tendou for not saying anything, angry at the doctors and nurses who kept spewing out numbers and words he couldn’t understand, angry at the universe for allowing Tendou to even get hurt.

But most of all, he was angry at himself. Angry because he hadn’t put all the pieces together, angry that he hadn’t thought anything of Tendou’s prolonged usage of the bathroom, angy that he hadn’t ever bothered to remember if Tendou was even at risk for a disease like Hanahaki.

He tried to squash these thoughts down for now.  _ It’s nobody’s fault,  _ he repeated in his mind, even though he didn’t believe it.

“Just- you- you almost fucking died.” Suga got out. “I don’t care if it’s hard to admit you have feelings for someone. Y-you almost died and I don’t know what I- You should’ve told me so I could help you at least!”

Suga could feel the tears in his eyes. Tendou flinched.

“I couldn’t tell you!” Tendou said.

“Why not?” Suga demanded. “I know you better than everybody on campus, I’d be a great wingman. I could’ve helped you get with whoever your crush is. We could’ve avoided all of this!”

“I just- I couldn’t tell you, alright?” Tendou repeated. “I’m sorry. Now I’m gonna decide how long I want to keep going in for these throat operations to delay the inevitable, so please just stop yelling.”

Suga stared at him, feeling like someone had hit him with a truck. “..You’re not taking the lungs surgery?”

“No.”

“Tendou, that means you’ll die.”

“I know.”

“Why the fuck are you so calm about this?” Suga had to stop his voice from raising again.

“Ever since the first petal I knew I was gonna die. And I never wanna stop loving him, even if he doesn’t love me back. So. I guess I’ll be taking the dying option.”

Suga’s brain short circuited. “You’re killing yourself over some guy?”

“Yes.”

“Are you stupid?”

“Yes.” Tendou gave a weak smile.

Suga bit his lip. “There’s no way whoever this person is is worth killing yourself over. So just. Please take the damn surgery.”

“He IS worth dying over.” Tendou protested.

“He’s not, I bet he’s an asshole!”

“He is and I still love him.” Tendou said harshly. “So shut the hell up and just let me do this.”

“No! You can’t die on me just for some stupid idiot who doesn’t love you back! Why doesn’t he love you back? He’s a fucking asshole if he doesn’t, you’re you!”

Tendou stared at him in silence for a moment before he broke into a fit of laughter and the nurse rushed over to get him to calm down. Suga just stared, confused, and concerned.

Once he was done, he looked at Suga with a sad smile. “You don’t get it.”

“I get it just fine, you’re in love with a prick who’s killing you.”

“I am.” He confirmed. “But you still haven’t figured out who it is.”

“What?”

“I want you,” Tendou leaned up as far as he could towards Suga without jostling the medical equipment, “to take a wild fucking guess as to who it is. Here’s a few hints; I’ve known him for four years, he works at a cafe, and he's my roommate. I’ve been hopelessly pining over him for a year until my brain gave out and made me develop flowers in my goddamn lungs, and I’ve been hiding my disease from him in fear that he’ll find out and hate me. And today, he finally found out after seeing me passed out in our bathroom, and now I’m going to die.”

“Tendou-” Suga tried to say, finally realizing.

“I’m going to die, and he’s going to hate me for it.”

“ _ Tendou, _ ” Suga said harsher. His eyes stung with tears. “You absolute idiot. Why didn’t you just tell me?”

“Because you hate me now, I bet.”

“No- no, not at all, what the fuck.” Suga gave a shaky laugh as he grabbed Tendou’s hand. “I love you too. Except I think I only just realized.”

Tendou looked at him with his wide red eyes, frozen stiff.

“..Really?”

“Yes, you moron.”

Tendou flopped back down on his pillow. “Oh, thank god, I thought I might actually die.”

“Wow,” Suga laughed again. Everything felt unreal. “You only care cause now your sorry ass won’t die, huh.”

Tendou squawked indignantly. “No!”

The nurse, who had been standing off to the side taking notes on Tendou’s vitals, cleared her throat. The two of them turned to look at her, suddenly very aware of her presence.

She seemed to notice their embarrassment. “Don’t worry, a lot of Hanahaki patients who manage to recover end up having their whole confession witnessed by a nurse. Now, um, Satori Tendou, I’m sorry to break the mood, but we’ll need to run some tests and give you some medicine to get rid of the rest of the flowers in order for you to fully recover.”

Tendou, whose previously very pale face had flushed pink, nodded weakly. “Yeah, just um- can I see my mom too now?”

The nurse nodded and left the room. A few minutes later Tendou-san entered the room and looked between them.

“Judging by both your expressions, the news is good?” Tendou-san asked.

Tendou sat up and lifted his and Suga’s interlocked hands. “Better than good. Mom, this is my boyfriend, Koushi Sugawara.”

**Author's Note:**

> for those wondering, the meaning behind variegated carnations is 'regret for a love that is not reciprocated'. if you give this flower to someone it shows you do not reciprocate their feelings.
> 
> anyways, i hope you enjoyed this read!  
>    
> [my twitter!](https://mobile.twitter.com/tktendou)


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